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My MS journey to happiness and joy, by Gary Stephenson


My MS journey to happiness and joy, by Gary Stephenson I will start by changing one word in the wonderful song for the film ‘Love Story’: “Where do I begin, to tell the story of how great a love can be”. I will change that to: “Where do I begin to tell the story of how great a life can be” Life does change when you have MS, but you can still enjoy a great life, a joyous life, a life full of love, don’t let MS define you or who you are. I read that a person with MS uses 30 percent more energy at rest than a person without MS: think about that! You need to go easy on yourself. I was diagnosed in 2006 at 48 and was overwhelmed. I couldn’t cope. I was angry, confused, and suicidal, I could no longer burn the candle at both ends, I couldn’t multitask like before. My brain couldn’t cope, and my body could not keep up. By 11.30 in the morning, I was totally wiped out. I retired at 55 years old. A year’s worth of cognitive-behavioral therapy taught me that I could still do what I used to do to the same standard. I just took a darn sight longer. It was the mental reset that I needed. Yes, I still overdo things in the garden, and physical fatigue hits. Or I write too much and cognitive fatigue wipes me out. When either of these happens to me, I just rest. If I really overdo things, then the following day I rest, giving my mind and body the time they deserve. I no longer feel guilty. Why should I. My body and mind need recovery time. Think 30 percent more energy at rest and you can understand what happens with activity. There are times when I’m cognitively too tired to watch a movie, I listen to music, close my eyes and relax. If I can’t do something one day, then fine I’ll do it when I can. No harm done. Life is to be enjoyed not endured. Things will still get done, just later. Give yourself a break; it does work. Like most of us, I still have a lot of annoying symptoms for which there are drugs, creams, cooling towels, cooling jacket, cold shower, calf socks for calf cramps, gentle exercise, walking sticks, bladder (know where the nearest toilet is!), positive thinking and being gentle with yourself works wonders: or a cuddle with our rabbits. I started writing to keep my mind active with no intention of publishing. My literary agent has recently achieved a 10-year contract with a new publisher, which was great news. They will republish my Charles Langham political environmental trilogy before Christmas, and next year my children’s book based on my rabbits. They want my new novel, a murder mystery called, ‘Occidendum me’ (a man explains to his wife how and why he died and who killed him) and any further books I write. My agent knows I have MS and I research a lot and write at my own pace, for my own enjoyment with no deadlines. That way it stays an enjoyable pastime. If I’m too tired to write, then I don’t: it’s that easy. I have a storyline for a fourth Charles Langham novel forming in my mind… My agent has retained all the film rights for my books. Adapting a novel to a screenplay is hard work using specific software. The page limit is strictly 120 pages. One page equals one minute of film. You must keep the essence of the book whilst culling so much to fit the page limit. We do everything we can to make life that little bit easier. We have a love of travel and before Covid alternated each year between a UK trip via Singapore, which we love, and going on cruises. We use wheelchair assistance through airports, which is less fatiguing. We plan everything in advance down to the smallest detail to ensure all will go smoothly and stress-free. The journey is part of the holiday and should be enjoyable. We do everything to make it so. We have two house therapy rabbits, eight-year-old siblings. They are a joy. We worry more about their health than ours! Both have arthritis and are on many medications. We love gardening and have made the garden as easy to look after as possible. We still grow our own vegetables; out of the rabbits' reach of course, and rhubarb which we use to make wine and crumble. We treat ourselves to Ardbeg Islay malt and Remy Martin and certain wines, like Malbec, and enjoy a tipple before dinner. Why not, life is here to enjoy. With MS, we still have a life of love, joy, and achievement. Buy Gary’s books, and support us! For more information and the story and true data behind the books: www.garypaulstephenson.com Books are available on TradeMe: search Gary Paul Stephenson Gary and Dee have kindly offered to donate $5.00 for every book sold to MS Auckland. Thanks so much! **As shared for Multiple News** See less

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